this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
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Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
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Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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