so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Randomize
