Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Randomize