Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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