Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
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