You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize