Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
