that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
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