I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
