You're completely useless in the revolution.
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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