no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
