OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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