My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
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