Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Randomize
