First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Randomize