this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
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