We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
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