Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
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