She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
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