Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize
