Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
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