chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize