have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Randomize
