Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Randomize
