Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!