Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
