My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I am one with the molecules
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Randomize