MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
