dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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