Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Randomize
