is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
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