he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
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