Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize