giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
