dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
