There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
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