operation have a gay friend backfired
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
