Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
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I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
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