when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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