She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
