I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
