Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
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