so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
