Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Reggie can tackle my bush.
She even gives head with a lisp.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
