WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
The power of my boobs compel you
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
