she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Randomize
