Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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