You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
