Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
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