Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Randomize
